Book #91: Cannibal Cheerleader by Tiffany Drake

Chase is only sixteen, but she can kill a camp counselor with a bow and arrow from a hundred yards. She knows nineteen different ways to prepare hitchhiker. And she can shake a mean pom pom.

Chase is a cannibal, and when she’s violently uprooted her from her primitive, isolated mountain life and dropped into modern society, three ordinary high school cheerleaders discover her incredible knack for their sport. Fortunately for the girls, Chase wants to sink her teeth into cheerleading almost more than she wants to sink her teeth into them.

Taking her under their wing and keeping her past a secret, the cheerleaders enroll Chase in school, knowing her prodigious talents are just what their squad needs, even if her appetite isn’t. But old habits die hard—Chase’s journey through normal teenage life quickly leaves a trail of blood and bodies, and the local police chief begins to pursue her with a ravenous thirst.

With local law enforcement closing in and her own gruesome nature working against her, is there any way Chase can keep her cheer dream alive? Or will she lose her new friends—and her life—just as she gets her first taste of high school? 

Oh my god. I am seriously in love with this book. I grabbed this book purely for the title and the blurb. I knew with a title like Cannibal Cheerleader the book was either going to be funny or be one of the worst books around. And, believe me, I love reading horrible books (there will be more on that in future blog posts).

But this book was amazing. AMAZING.

I’m not shitting with you. I loved every second of this book. It screams of horror tropes, gore-tastic ways of dying, and made me pee I was laughing so hard. This isn’t a book for a person who thinks they are going to get a horror. This is a book that is written by someone who knows their way around a B-rated horror slasher flick and decided to turn the tropes into a handstand.

I have to say that I have no doubt Tiffany Drake knew she was writing a book that wasn’t supposed to be taken seriously. There is absolutely no way. The humor in this book is set in a way that the audience isn’t explained what is going on. Instead, there are quite a few moments where the reader is supposed to infer on what has previously happened. And that is masterful.

I’m serious. I love this book. I want this book to be made into a horror comedy just so I can watch it over and over again and giggle as I do. Am I going to be reading book two? You’re damn right I will be!

Final Rating: 5/5

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